The Puny Pundit

Musings of a big guy with small thoughts.

Mr. Mom Day 2

Wow…oww.  I am really tired.  Yesterday was a good day.  The kids were great and there weren’t too many glitches in the force.  Below is a timeline of the events between 7am and 2am March 23…

7:00am…Woke up and got the kids ready for school.  I made them breakfast (eggs and corned beef hash).  Because I haven’t done this in a really long time I messed up the rations and so #5 got less than one bite of corned beef hash.  It was kind of funny but at the time I didn’t care.  I had to get other stuff ready.  #1 being the responsible oldest child instructs each of the other kids to give #5 one spoonful each.  Man…even little kids know that capitalism is flawed.

8:00am…Drop off #1-3 at school.  Come back home and get #4 and #5 ready for school.  Because I was short on time #4, 5, and I were still in our PJ’s.  I can’t imagine what the people thought when they helped my kids out of the car at the drop off zone.

9:00am…Drop off #4 at school and then go to work out.

11:30am…Pick up #4 and head into downtown for a meeting with our non-profit director.  We have a nursery at the church office so #4 and #5 go in there while I have a meeting.

1:00pm…Take to the girls to lunch.  At this point I realize how different my life has been the last two days.  Listening to Dan Patrick Radio Show has been replaced by #4’s non-stop talking.  I don’t think she has stopped talking for the last two years.  Here is the funny thing about her…she doesn’t care if you are listening or not.  If she wants to talk, its showtime.

2:30pm…Pick up #1-3.  Note to reader…Some of you may be wondering why lunch took 1.5 hours.  Well #4 and #5 like to stop and smell the roses.  They are not convinced that the goal or the destination is important.  They are in it for the journey and the process.  I think #5 walks at a snail’s pace just to get under my skin so I will pick her up.  Each time I yell, “Hurry up,” she decides to slow down a gear or two and mumbles something.  I still haven’t figured out what the heck she is saying but I am sure it is a derogatory statement about my incompetence.

3:00pm… Drop off #1 at her piano lesson

3:30pm…Pick up #1 from piano lesson

3:30-4:30pm…Help kids with homework. I hated school work as a kid.  Now I gotta do other people’s work.  Wow.  Not fun.  Oh yeah…I also fed them snacks.  Translation…I told them to eat the bags of chips that were on the table.  I know that’s not good but I am too tired to care.

4:30-5:30pm…Fell asleep on the couch while the kids watched tv.  Went to bed 2:30am the night before doing laundry and was exhausted.  This nap was not refreshing at all.  My leg was twitching which kept waking me up.  I would periodically wake up screaming instructions at the kids for nothing.

5:30pm…Start preparing dinner.  While I am making gourmet frozen food, #5 starts screaming.  I go into the bathroom where she is and discovered she pee’d in her pants and there is urine all over the bathroom floor.  I am frustrated because I do not want to burn my frozen creation (the instructions were very clear…over medium heat stir occasionally after putting contents into a pan).  Anyways, I ask #1 to put on rubber gloves (yes we have a whole box because something nasty always happens) and take #5 to the bathroom upstairs.  I instruct her to take off #5 wet clothes and put into a trash bag.  While this happens I keep checking on my frozen creation and mop up the floor.  I then plate the food and run upstairs where #5 has been in the bathtub for 15 minutes by herself naked.  When I get there she is curled into a ball mumbling, “So sorry daddy.  So sorry.”  I wash her up and get her some new clothes.  The kids eat their dinner.

6:30-7:30pm…Clean up the house because I had a couple coming over for premarital counseling.  Since I am mister mom, I asked them to come to my home.

7:30pm…Put #4 and #5 to bed and pray with them…(1) Give mommy good rest, (2) Let her have good times with God, and (3) BRING HER BACK HOME!!!!

8:00-11:00pm…Dinner with the couple and premarital counseling session.

11:00-11:30pm…Talk on the phone with the wife.

11:30-2:00am…Do some church work (with some Sports Center sprinkled in)

…Wednesday March 24 7:00am…Wake up and start all over again…

Filed under: Mr. Mom

3 Responses

  1. jason says:

    duh-de-duh….duh-de-duh!

    Looking forward to the top 10 plays on Choi Center!

  2. jenny hwang says:

    “Each time I yell, “Hurry up,” she decides to slow down a gear or two and mumbles something. I still haven’t figured out what the heck she is saying but I am sure it is a derogatory statement about my incompetence.”

    that’s why I LOVE #5.

  3. yoonie says:

    note to self: don’t read this in a graduate class during a dry lecture…i cannot keep a mischievous, creepy smile off my face trying to hold in the laughter.

    but i won’t learn. off to read the next ones, good luck!!

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